Blah, blah, blah

Party time! Bexcellent! (sorry)

2011-11-07T01:15:00.004-04:00

Major highlight in my life recently was meeting my wee baby Bex and hanging with his awesome parents. That kid has no clue how lucky he is. Of course, when he gets older and he needs a reminding of how much he should appreciate his parents, I may have to leave out the part about Lani and I drinking beer in the park and running away post haste to a bar when we saw the boy coming with his nanny. It is as though nothing had changed in our lives from last year, we just have this really new cool toy (Bex) and we went to bed earlier. And woke up earlier. Get ready for the wee lad. He has a lot to say.

Baby, baby, baby, babybabybabybabybaby!!!

2011-06-24T00:45:00.002-04:00

What has happened here?! Seriously. Was there something in the air last September? I know I certainly wasn't feeling particularly inspired or excited, or like I needed to jump in with both feet and completely change my life for FOREVER.

There are so many new June babies that I cannot even keep track. It seems like every day I look at Facebook there is a new baby or 2...some I expected with great anticipation, others I had no clue about.

Waverly, Michael, Theo, Sayenna, Max, Hattie, Bex. The sad thing is that I know I am forgetting some. But there are also at least 3 more coming in the next few days. Is this ridiculous?

Let's just focus in on two extra important ones here...a MAJOR congrats for the highly anticipated little addition to the Hambly/Kaufmann family for little Miss Hattie West Kaufmann. This baby will certainly entertain her peers and never be at a loss for engaging conversation if she takes after her lovely parents. Can't wait to meet her.

And the baby that brings the most excitement for me in my life is little Bex. The first of my girls to have a baby! (Rainey...you know you were really the first, but that was a long time ago and you are now a seasoned pro; we are just novices heading into marriage/baby-some-day land around here). I am an AUNTIE! I want to be with that gorgeous little munchkin all day every day and I haven't even met him yet. Hell, I don't even know if he has a middle name or what his last name is. I just know he is my new favorite little baby and he has a very special place in my heart, just like his mother Lani. I just want to squash little Bex with love.

*Added side note: I am the baby birthdate psychic. I wanted Hattie to be born on my sister Laura's birthday. She was. I wanted Bex to be born on my nephew Landon's birthday. He was. Both took an extra week or so of occupancy to make this happen, but I thank you, wee ones. You have excellent birthdays.

Baby fever...no doubt about it. Makes me happy. See, it even made me update this old boring blog.

2010 FTW

2011-01-08T01:18:00.003-04:00

I was reflecting on how dull and uneventful I thought 2010 was, and then I REALLY thought about it. Hardly!

Managing a store on St. John, shopping weekend in Atlanta, seriously HOT tropical days, Jost Van Dyke weekend, get engaged, get married, move to Seattle, 10 year class reunion, Joy's dad dies, start managing Kasala, Jason's biz nearly fails, lots of family visits, Jason heads back to St. John - not to be seen for 4+ months, Camp Wedding, lots of alone time, Jacynth's dad dies (followed quickly by more untimely demises for poor J), Lani gets pregnant, Jason returns, enter 2011.

Rubbing my hands with anticipation for 2011...most excitement for St. John time, a wee Lani/Topher baby, a "wedding", and???

I really could not have said it better myself. Really.

2010-12-21T16:53:00.002-04:00

I love me some Ricky Gervais. Not only is he an amazing comedian, but he put into eloquent words something that I cannot. See, I would love to post this on Facebook, but I have some seriously psycho Christian types that are my "friends" and they would probably freak. And hold your horses now, not everyone who is Christian is painfully fanatical about it. I do in fact have several people I love and respect who are Christians. But they aren't those Christians. And I am stopping my jabbering now, because you should just read this (longish, but a quick read):

A Holiday Message from Ricky Gervais: Why I'm an Atheist

Why don’t you believe in God? I get that question all the time. I always try to give a sensitive, reasoned answer. This is usually awkward, time consuming and pointless. People who believe in God don’t need proof of his existence, and they certainly don’t want evidence to the contrary. They are happy with their belief. They even say things like “it’s true to me” and “it’s faith.” I still give my logical answer because I feel that not being honest would be patronizing and impolite. It is ironic therefore that “I don’t believe in God because there is absolutely no scientific evidence for his existence and from what I’ve heard the very definition is a logical impossibility in this known universe,” comes across as both patronizing and impolite.

Arrogance is another accusation. Which seems particularly unfair. Science seeks the truth. And it does not discriminate. For better or worse it finds things out. Science is humble. It knows what it knows and it knows what it doesn’t know. It bases its conclusions and beliefs on hard evidence -- evidence that is constantly updated and upgraded. It doesn’t get offended when new facts come along. It embraces the body of knowledge. It doesn’t hold on to medieval practices because they are tradition. If it did, you wouldn’t get a shot of penicillin, you’d pop a leach down your trousers and pray. Whatever you “believe,” this is not as effective as medicine. Again you can say, “It works for me,” but so do placebos. My point being, I’m saying God doesn’t exist. I’m not saying faith doesn’t exist. I know faith exists. I see it all the time. But believing in something doesn’t make it true. Hoping that something is true doesn’t make it true. The existence of God is not subjective. He either exists or he doesn’t. It’s not a matter of opinion. You can have your own opinions. But you can’t have your own facts.

Why don’t I believe in God? No, no no, why do YOU believe in God? Surely the burden of proof is on the believer. You started all this. If I came up to you and said, “Why don’t you believe I can fly?” You’d say, “Why would I?” I’d reply, “Because it’s a matter of faith.” If I then said, “Prove I can’t fly. Prove I can’t fly see, see, you can’t prove it can you?” You’d probably either walk away, call security or throw me out of the window and shout, ‘’F—ing fly then you lunatic.”

This, is of course a spirituality issue, religion is a different matter. As an atheist, I see nothing “wrong” in believing in a god. I don’t think there is a god, but belief in him does no harm. If it helps you in any way, then that’s fine with me. It’s when belief starts infringing on other people’s rights when it worries me. I would never deny your right to believe in a god. I would just rather you didn’t kill people who believe in a different god, say. Or stone someone to death because your rulebook says their sexuality is immoral. It’s strange that anyone who believes that an all-powerful all-knowing, omniscient power responsible for everything that happens, would also want to judge and punish people for what they are. From what I can gather, pretty much the worst type of person you can be is an atheist. The first four commandments hammer this point home. There is a god, I’m him, no one else is, you’re not as good and don’t forget it. (Don’t murder anyone, doesn’t get a mention till number 6.)

When confronted with anyone who holds my lack of religious faith in such contempt, I say, “It’s the way God made me.”

But what are atheists really being accused of?

The dictionary definition of God is “a supernatural creator and overseer of the universe.” Included in this definition are all deities, goddesses and supernatural beings. Since the beginning of recorded history, which is defined by the invention of writing by the Sumerians around 6,000 years ago, historians have cataloged over 3700 supernatural beings, of which 2870 can be considered deities.

So next time someone tells me they believe in God, I’ll say “Oh which one? Zeus? Hades? Jupiter? Mars? Odin? Thor? Krishna? Vishnu? Ra?…” If they say “Just God. I only believe in the one God,” I’ll point out that they are nearly as atheistic as me. I don’t believe in 2,870 gods, and they don’t believe in 2,869.

I used to believe in God. The Christian one that is.

I loved Jesus. He was my hero. More than pop stars. More than footballers. More than God. God was by definition omnipotent and perfect. Jesus was a man. He had to work at it. He had temptation but defeated sin. He had integrity and courage. But He was my hero because He was kind. And He was kind to everyone. He didn’t bow to peer pressure or tyranny or cruelty. He didn’t care who you were. He loved you. What a guy. I wanted to be just like Him.

One day when I was about 8 years old, I was drawing the crucifixion as part of my Bible studies homework. I loved art too. And nature. I loved how God made all the animals. They were also perfect. Unconditionally beautiful. It was an amazing world.

I lived in a very poor, working-class estate in an urban sprawl called Reading, about 40 miles west of London. My father was a laborer and my mother was a housewife. I was never ashamed of poverty. It was almost noble. Also, everyone I knew was in the same situation, and I had everything I needed. School was free. My clothes were cheap and always clean and ironed. And mum was always cooking. She was cooking the day I was drawing on the cross.

I was sitting at the kitchen table when my brother came home. He was 11 years older than me, so he would have been 19. He was as smart as anyone I knew, but he was too cheeky. He would answer back and get into trouble. I was a good boy. I went to church and believed in God -– what a relief for a working-class mother. You see, growing up where I did, mums didn’t hope as high as their kids growing up to be doctors; they just hoped their kids didn’t go to jail. So bring them up believing in God and they’ll be good and law abiding. It’s a perfect system. Well, nearly. 75 percent of Americans are God-‐fearing Christians; 75 percent of prisoners are God-‐fearing Christians. 10 percent of Americans are atheists; 0.2 percent of prisoners are atheists.

But anyway, there I was happily drawing my hero when my big brother Bob asked, “Why do you believe in God?” Just a simple question. But my mum panicked. “Bob,” she said in a tone that I knew meant, “Shut up.” Why was that a bad thing to ask? If there was a God and my faith was strong it didn’t matter what people said.

Oh…hang on. There is no God. He knows it, and she knows it deep down. It was as simple as that. I started thinking about it and asking more questions, and within an hour, I was an atheist.

Wow. No God. If mum had lied to me about God, had she also lied to me about Santa? Yes, of course, but who cares? The gifts kept coming. And so did the gifts of my new found atheism. The gifts of truth, science, nature. The real beauty of this world. I learned of evolution -– a theory so simple that only England’s greatest genius could have come up with it. Evolution of plants, animals and us –- with imagination, free will, love, humor. I no longer needed a reason for my existence, just a reason to live. And imagination, free will, love, humor, fun, music, sports, beer and pizza are all good enough reasons for living.

But living an honest life -– for that you need the truth. That’s the other thing I learned that day, that the truth, however shocking or uncomfortable, in the end leads to liberation and dignity.

So what does the question “Why don’t you believe in God?” really mean. I think when someone asks that they are really questioning their own belief. In a way they are asking “what makes you so special? “How come you weren’t brainwashed with the rest of us?” “How dare you say I’m a fool and I’m not going to heaven, f— you!” Let’s be honest, if one person believed in God he would be considered pretty strange. But because it’s a very popular view it’s accepted. And why is it such a popular view? That’s obvious. It’s an attractive proposition. Believe in me and live forever. Again if it was just a case of spirituality this would be fine.

“Do unto others…” is a good rule of thumb. I live by that. Forgiveness is probably the greatest virtue there is. But that’s exactly what it is -‐ a virtue. Not just a Christian virtue. No one owns being good. I’m good. I just don’t believe I’ll be rewarded for it in heaven. My reward is here and now. It’s knowing that I try to do the right thing. That I lived a good life. And that’s where spirituality really lost its way. When it became a stick to beat people with. “Do this or you’ll burn in hell.”

You won’t burn in hell. But be nice anyway.

Camp Wedding

2010-11-02T23:07:00.005-04:00

Yes, admittedly I have sucked at keeping this whole blog thingy up. Back to Seattle and not a whole lot of inspiration. With that being said, I let a totally special and amazing event slip by without a word. Shame on me! It was, after all, the wedding of one of my best friends, Miss Angie Bakke.

Angie married Michael at the Olympic Park Institute out on the Washington peninsula. What an amazing event in a beautiful place. Nothing makes me happier than seeing the people I love IN love. A HUGE, MASSIVE, GIGANTIC congrats to the beautiful couple. I only wish that I had a photo of the stunning couple on their wedding day to share because it was....stunning!

Brynn, Lani, Joy and Emily...what a perfect camp wedding outfit combo!

Didi was in charge of signage, as she obviously should be.

Jan and Angie...the beautiful Bakke women

Lake Crescent. Amazeballs! And don't even get me started on the stars at night. Shooowee!

What up

2010-07-08T00:52:00.003-04:00

Seattle, that's what up. It has been madness moving back here, and admittedly, a bit of a culture shock. But I am getting in the groove. Back at my old job, loving my apartment and being back in the old hood. And since summer finally started yesterday (that would be July 6th, everyone), I am a happy gal. Everything is perfect except that Jason is on St. John. Oh, and I am not rich. Oh yeah, and then there's that whole oil leak thing, and suffering refugees, and, and, and....

Here are some photos of past few. My camera is pretty broken, so not a whole lot of shots turn out.

Full moon out my bedroom window

Sadie and I hang at the Space Needle when she visits

Sadie and I at the sculpture park

Day time out my window. Nice parking lot!

Does this look special to you? Although lacking decor in the bedroom, I have a brand new king size bed with luxurious white bedding. Happy me!

This shower rocks

2010-04-18T17:38:00.002-04:00

This is Dr. Jim Weller - in front of one of his paintings. He is a master woodworker and built his own totally fabulous home (and pictured with him is my fabulous friend Crystal who is back on island for a visit after nearly 2 years away...party!). And I just know it took a few smokey treats to inspire the creativity of this shower on his screened-in porch. A freaking double helix! Talk about a time-consuming endeavor. I love it.

Eeeww to the max

2010-04-01T20:55:00.003-04:00

Looked down to my neighbor's place below the other day from my porch...into a hamper that they just have there for whatever reason. Its main purpose seems to be to fill with putrid water and breed mosquitos, but I could not believe my eyes. I know we have big spiders, but???? Really???!!! Seriously, the pics do no justice. Glad it's dead.

Jost is the Most!

2010-03-23T21:51:00.003-04:00

FUN! We had the most incredibly fabulous weekend on Jost Van Dyke (Jost is pronounced 'Yoast') for Jason's 35th bday with our very special friend and tour guide Debbie. Jost is such a bitty little place that I've been to many times, but to actually go there and hang with the locals and rent a car to run around...it is just a totally different world. Debbie lived there for a bit so we got to hang with people we definitely would not have normally. Uncle Boy was a favorite. I mean, his name is UNCLE BOY. And he is the most amazing old dude ever. We stayed at Ivan's which is a famous spot for day trippers to pull up to for a day of drinking and fun, but actually hanging with the fabulous Ivan and looking at his old pictures was such a treat. It was drunken debauchery, as every Jost trip is, after all. Major dance party at Foxy's (I think pretty much I was the dance party); lots of my favorite St. Johnians (Garza family!) staying at Ivan's too; accidentally stealing someone's camera thinking it was Jason's phone-no resemblance whatsoever; meeting all the crazies on the little bitty 200 person island; having the bubbly pool all to ourselves and playing like little kids in the larger-than-average waves. It was absolutely paradise. And it is so close to St. John! Why has it taken me years to get over there to spend the night? Can't wait for the next go. In the meantime, photos (if my camera wasn't working so poorly, there would've been more)!

Uncle Boy! He's in his post-funeral leisure suit.

Bubbly Pool!

At Foxy's Taboo looking toward the dock.

Debbie and Jason enjoying at Bushwacker at Foxy's Taboo.

Another steep VI hill...looking toward Foxy's Taboo.

The Power of Engagement

2010-02-27T15:28:00.003-04:00

Last Saturday Jason and I got engaged! He caught me completely off guard as we walked between downtown Charlotte Amalie and Yacht Haven Grande by whipping the ring out on the street. It was not a mushy moment, thank goodness. Just a good ol' fashioned "Will you marry me?" Followed by me staring at the ring saying, "I love it!" a thousand times over. We still managed to try to get a few St. Thomas chores done, but we essentially just celebrated.

That's the thing about living on a small island prone to partying...everywhere you go, someone gets you drinks. Rhumb Lines, a favorite restaurant and Jason's former employer, got us tequila shots, wine, and hacked off the top of a delicious bottle of Veuve Clicquot with a sharp knife. Somehow we did not end up hungover. That remains a mystery.

So now to not even think about planning for awhile. Summer 2011 will be wedding time, at some point. Below, the ring...I love it (and in the tradition set forth by Lani and Angie, on a piece of non-vegan food)! Big old aquamarine in the perfect light blue. I wanted aquamarine because it is a strong stone and it kind of has a Caribbean blue hue...an ode to our relationship thus far. Jason told me it is also his birthstone and the stone for the month of our anniversary. Now I love it even more. Also, people tend to think it is a rather big blue diamond, but those people don't know anything, because if it was, it would have caused several million. Fun to mess with some minds though.

Villa Fab

2010-02-08T08:57:00.002-04:00

Another year, another successful Friends of the Virgin Islands National Park Gala. Check out the spot we had it this year. Soooooo amazing! I love this villa! You must peruse. The pool area and outdoors are so big it looks like a resort. Why can I not live this life? (We are really, truly working on it.) Oh, and of course we had to go through to collect and hide all those damn starfish they have everywhere since it is really not so friendly to the park to take live animals from the ocean. Small downfall.

Hot-lanta

2010-01-25T18:52:00.003-04:00

So I had my first official trip to the South this weekend, but I must say, it was hardly a 'Southern Experience'. In fact, the only time I got a breath of fresh air was when I got into and out of the taxi on the way from and to the airport. Ah well, another day.

My time in Atlanta was spent SHOPPING. Seriously, hardcore shopping. It was kind of fun, and although it was for someone else's store, we got a lot of stuff to get excited about. Also quite psyched about getting a huge discount when these things arrive on St. John. But it is also quite annoying to have to be cruising along to another's whims. Especially since we have totally different ideas about style and priorities. It was really exhausting. So exhausting that I did not get to see my friend Caroline who I haven't seen since we lived in South Africa. Sadness. I just couldn't bring myself to move or speak after a day of intense running around.

But I decided to use this trip to also network for myself. I found a ton of awesome contacts for great boutique things, and it has made me soooo very excited to start my own thing. At some point. Back in Seattle. Or near there anyway.

Although it was totally annoying to have to share a room with the store owner and her teenage daughter, deal with their obnoxious travel habits (yes, she is the person who runs right up to block everyone's way while they try to board the plane instead of sitting and waiting for her seat to be called; and she also had a freak-out while landing in St. Thomas that meant several flight attendants having to attend to her....ACK!), and get exhausted to the point of illness, it was an awesome trip! Now I want to go back and actually EXPERIENCE the real South. Another day, or more likely another year.

Decade in Review

2010-01-01T14:10:00.002-04:00

Graduated college, moved to New York, moved to Seattle, got a job, got more jobs, moved to the Virgin Islands, got a good boyfriend, got more jobs, turned 30.

Kinda boring, it seems. But there was a lot of fun in there too! Amazing friends, parties, trips, weddings, babies. So what about the next decade?? I will want it to read a little something like this...

Got married, moved back to Seattle for most of year, got kids, traveled A LOT, moved to Sydney, moved back to Seattle, moved to Paris, turned 40 (!!), moved back to Seattle.

I don't think that is asking too much!

Having a Moment

2009-12-15T19:57:00.001-04:00

When your two good friends make an article in Vogue, it kinda rocks. Go Megan! Go Didi! Go greenissexy.org!

Well Put

2009-11-16T11:57:00.000-04:00

Someone in power is finally going to state the obvious truth that gay marriage is absolutely necessary, and they’re not going to put it up for a vote, because that’s not what you do with basic human rights. You don’t let six wolves and four sheep vote on what to have for dinner (or in this case, what, fifty-two wolves and forty-eight sheep?).

The National Guard will stand outside the courthouses and force you to grow the hell up, and you will be remembered in history like those sad ugly white people yelling at the black kids coming to class.

And this isn’t the fifties. This is the twenty-first century. Your bisexual grandkids will still be able to Google your sorry ass and see that you were a spiteful hateful closeminded bigot. They’ll have your lying ads, annotated with footnotes showing how you knew you were lying at the time. They’ll have your ugly homophobic comments and your hate-filled fake news reports captured in crystal clarity on whatever magical Internet++ they’re using decades from now. And they’re going to be ashamed of you.

All you’ve done — all you’ve accomplished with your lies and hate and fearmongering — is to delay the inevitable. In the next few years, every widow who loses her home because she “wasn’t really married” to her life partner, and the life partner’s kids have a good lawyer? Every man who dies scared and alone because the man who should have been his husband wasn’t allowed to be at his bedside? Every not-spouse who dies because of not-health-coverage, coverage they would have gotten were they married? Every one of those things that happens between now and whenever the National Guard puts a little learnin’ on you?

That’s on you.

That’s your legacy.

-Suicide Blonde

You suck.

2009-10-09T11:30:00.002-04:00

Yes you, Missy Miss. You and your little retail store.

I applied for a part-time position at your store because I am rather bored. It is a painless, no-brainer sort of job and I don't care about the pay.

First of all, I know you a little, but you still had me fill out a stupid application. THEN, when I gave it to you, you had the audacity to ask me if I had any retail experience!

This really gets my buns a burnin'. First of all, yes, I do. A lot. BUT WHAT IF I DIDN'T??!! This is the most easy, basic job there is. I am not some sort of special needs individual. I am friendly and use at least a portion of my brain. Do I really need retail experience? NO. Why do YOU think this job is so special? It's not. It is a stupid retail position...say 'hi', be nice and helpful, ring up customer at cash register. A trained chimp could do it!

I don't even want that stupid job anymore. It's annoying for me to think about.

Ick.

2009-09-25T10:08:00.004-04:00

I hate this house. It is horrendous. Who would think to build a multi-million dollar villa and paint the whole damn thing that awful blue? With purple columns. Hideous! And I know that it is impossible to see, but instead of a real palm tree, they have some nasty metal "artsy" one.

Sadness is when...

2009-09-17T12:14:00.001-04:00

The father of one of your closest friends dies. Sorry Rainey.

Flashback to summer '09

2009-09-08T15:27:00.004-04:00

A review in pictures... Above: Little Will (Cousin Ryan's boy) visited with his mom Leslie. We spent the day at the pool at the Marriott on St. Thomas and went down waterslide A LOT. Twas fun!

More of the little dude. He really took to the water and was doing a great job.

Then...Megan and Little Michael's going away beach party at Francis. There were sooo many people. The kind of day that makes you really love St. John.

Kenny, the host with the most. Broke out shrimp cocktail when everyone needed a snack to temper the alcohol. Above he is serving it up to all the ocean-bound folk, below, preparing. Proudly served in lovely crystal glasses.

What a turn-out!

The time is now!

2009-08-26T10:38:00.003-04:00

Okay, all 3 of you. It is time to tell you about my work project and call you to your duty of sharing it with everyone in your world (if you want, that would be great).

Gleegarden.com

That is my new website! I am broke as a joke at the moment, and I am not sure how this will end up paying off (people have to click on the ad banners at the top and side of the pages and make purchases through them), but it has been fun! And it will continue to be fun.

I only want to represent the best, so I welcome ideas. Lani and Didi have already been an awesome help, and I welcome more product must-haves from your lives.

Hope you enjoy, and if you do, please pass along to all you know. Much love to you for your support!

Project

2009-08-11T14:59:00.002-04:00

So, I haven't been too incredibly bored since being back on St. John because I have the fun project of starting my own biz. I love having my own schedule and actually being interested in what I am doing, although there has definitely been a learning curve.

Details to follow, since I will need all 3 readers help getting the word out about my no-so-private website/biz. Info soon come.

Rock on

2009-07-22T11:18:00.005-04:00

The weight of sadness due to being back on St. John for an undetermined/infinite amount of time is really looming over me today (just got back last night, sans luggage, of course). With that said, I thought I would share some wonderful things to try to brighten things up a bit.

1. I have recently discovered Monocle magazine due to a visit to my cousin Ryan's abode in Alaska. It was so refreshing to see such a sophisticated, smart, and worldy publication unlike anything I've ever encountered before. What I wouldn't give for a subscription! Why is this so difficult, you may ask? Well, a subscription costs 75 pounds (about $150 U.S. Dollars!) for 10 issues. Another day.

2. My favorite design blog, Design Sponge, which I check religiously sometimes multiple perusings a day as she updates a lot (and yes, I do have a lot of spare moments), showed me to another great blog some styley hip ladies that I will now need to check frequently. The link...

http://www.vivavenacava.blogspot.com/

These ladies make me wish I was living another life. A much more traveled, urban, stylish life.

3. Lastly on today's parade of goodies, my nephews, Landon and Eli. I love them and can't stop thinking about how I miss them! They are so well-behaved, hilarious, cute, loving and fun. And they adore their Auntie Momo (that's me!). Here are a few pics of my recent visit to Wyo.

Keller hyphen Carroll OR Carroll hyphen Keller?

2009-07-08T18:42:00.003-04:00

At last. The brilliant video footage from Micah of Didi and Tim's performance at Lani's wedding. My moose ears? A gift at the beginning of the ceremony for the long travel distance.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rMYp2erPdhw

Off da rock!

2009-06-16T11:55:00.002-04:00

Getting off the island! Getting off the island! It has been since August that I have been stuck on this little 8 x 3 island. A few short excursions to nearby St. Thomas took the edge off. So now, as all 3 readers already know, I am OUT. For a month or so. Seattle, Alaska, Oregon, Wyoming. I am a happy girl. The only thing that would make life more perfect is if I didn't have to return to St. John. I will try to update on some of the fun travels stuff, but I can't make any promises.

Shopping, friends, music, wedding, more friends, family, more family. YAAAAY!

Drunk to the left. Drunk to the right.

2009-05-11T17:28:00.001-04:00

I knew it! This place is crazy.

Lonely Planet-Top Bars in the World

Noted

2009-05-04T18:27:00.002-04:00

Important things to remember about tropical rains/flooding:

1. If you are finally desperate enough to order that water to fill your cistern, it WILL rain the next day, and it will rain soooooo damn much.

2. Keep electronics, important papers and whatnot off the floor, because it is likely that they will get completely saturated by the leaks in the house.

3. It is nice if your car doubles as a boat.

4. Plastic bags become an absolute necessary fashion accessory.

5. Open air cars with windows that don't work and a soft roof that turns into a bathtub really suck.

6. Do not, for any reason whatsoever, go swimming at the beach for the next several days. I don't care if you're on vacation.

Ode to the beaches of St. John

2009-04-26T16:04:00.005-04:00

The beaches here are beyond lovely. Hawaii can suck it. Mexico can suck something too. Pretty much everywhere in the world-aside from, I hear, Bali-can find something to start sucking on and suck, suck, suck till sore and raw. Here are a few shots. Sadly, I cannot track down a bunch. But these will do.

My madre at Francis Bay

The Garza girls at Gibney

Salt Pond

Denis Beach all to ourselves. Definitely a personal favorite.

Brown Bay

The most famous...Trunk Bay

Sadly absent: Salomon, Maho, Ditleff, and my rock beaches with unknown names.

Me and My Beloved Virgin

2009-04-11T11:26:00.005-04:00

That is the title of the book I am reading right now by a famous old St. Johnian, Guy Benjamin. He's a brilliant old man with the Coral Bay elementary school named after him. Reading his book about how amazing St. John used to be-before the influx of building and tourism and such-makes me want to leave and never look back. We humans sure know how to ruin a good thing.

But I will be leaving soon, and as wonderful as St. John is in so many ways, there are a lot of totally ridiculous things that do not add to the charm, but just straight up piss me off. Here's a little list:

-Tip jars in the grocery store check-out line. I don't think so.
-Snotty and indifferent customer service. Why would I throw a tip in your little plastic jar if you are so rude?
-West Indian men. So over-sexed, brutal, macho, abusive. My West Indian lady friends always say that I am lucky to be with a white man, and totally feel like it is their role in life to be with these useless losers. They expect me to cheat on Jason without a care in the world. I AM GENERALIZING. There are a few exceptions, but VERY FEW.
-Chickens. I want to kick them, but instead just throw rocks in their general direction.
-Rats. The only time I have seen them is in my apartment, and that is NOT a good place for them to be.
-Lack of good friends. All my most amazing friends are in the states. I miss them constantly.
-Non-committal friends. People make plans, don't show up. Don't ever make plans, don't do anything but drink. I loved all the fun things we did in the States...dinner parties and this and that. Doesn't happen down here without a lot of effort (usually on my part).
-Idiotic government. I could rant for ages. I know all governments are pretty idiotic, but down here is a whole different level.
-Lawlessness. Murder? Well, no problem as long as you are related to a police officer! Rape, ah, too much trouble to investigate, don't want to piss anyone off.
-Disregard for environment. Maybe it is just more obvious here. 3/4 of the island is national park. People come here to visit a tropical paradise. Locals protect it voraciously. Well then why does everyone (locals and tourists) put their cigarette butts out in the beautiful sandy beaches and throw their garbage on the ground? The oceans are filled with plastic and the fish and coral are dying off. Again, humans always find a way to ruin a good thing.
-Tourists. God, people can be so annoying. Walking down the middle of the street, disrespect for local culture, not properly tipping (it is 20% here, just like in the states). "Go back to your suburb!" my neighbor Tyler would say. People come here to get away and experience something different, but when they get to experience 'island time' and the slower, laid-back pace with less amenities, they can't handle it. Drives me nuts.
-Expensive crappy food. It costs a lot to eat here because it costs a lot to transport food here. Our vegetables suck, our milk is spoiled, organic and local choices are rare. If only we were a more self-sufficient island with food production, like back when Mr. Guy Benjamin grew up here.
-Yucky bugs. Admittedly, this is a pretty weak complaint, but cockroaches and such are icky, icky, icky.
-Mildewy, smelly clothing and towels. I've had to throw some things away because they got too moldy. That smell has delved deeply into the interiors of my memory bank.
-Laundry. I curse you laundry! If I lived in a normal house with a washer and dryer, I would actually enjoy this task. But no. I have to trek weeks of dirty laundry to a busy, stiflingly warm laundromat. It is a sweaty, nasty, tedious workout. And it is expensive.

Those are my rants for the moment. When I get disgusted it makes it easier for me to think about leaving this place that I really do love. But guess what I love more??? SEATTLE!

Mum and Me

2009-04-08T17:02:00.003-04:00

Yesterday my mother left her first visit to my little tropical paradise. And she absolutely loved it. I told her to brag about it to all the people who haven't made it down here in the FOUR PLUS YEARS that I've been stuck on this rock. Yes, I am bringing THAT up again.

There were soooo many pictures, I couldn't possibly chose from all of them. Unlike Sadie's visit where we only took about 3. I think that is because she used to live here, but SERIOUSLY--neither of them brought a camera on vacation. What is up with that? My camera goes everywhere with me.

The pic above was taken whilst covered in salt and grime and emanating a boozey smell after a day of boating to the BVIs. Oh, those days in the sun are long ones. I believe we were asleep for night around 7:30 or 8pm, which happened a little too frequently after days of sun and drinks. Life really is not so hard down here.

L-L-L-Lani!!!

2009-03-21T21:49:00.003-04:00

I love this girl, and now I get to be a bridesmaid at her wedding. If only we could get her into those euro trunks again (she stuffs). Ridiculousness.

Homogenity on St. John

2009-03-14T19:02:00.007-04:00

St. Patty's is such a whitey's holiday, nary a West Indian in sight during the revelry of our little island parade. Not a disappointment, drunken hilarity reigned supreme.

Roland had an amazing costume with Incredible Hulk slippers. He followed the Mocko Jumbie all over the place.

Guess who I was thinking of when I took this picture. Miss Joy Fischer. Pretty cat with a pretty necklace.

I would've put up some video, but alas, I have no clue how. Pathetic.

Happiness is...

2009-03-12T14:10:00.001-04:00

Our box of oranges from Dominica. Delish! I love that island, and I love the fruit that comes from there. It's like candy.

Pain

2009-03-04T16:50:00.003-04:00

Part I.

8 Tuff Miles, I am your bitch. Granted, I was not supposed to drink such a large quantity of alcoholic beverages the night before getting up early to walk my way over steep and hot terrain to Coral Bay on the other side of the island, but still. Jason and Sadie went with me, and although we were all exhausted and sore, I was definitely in the worst shape. Is it supposed to be hard to go from zero ft to 1,000 ft (and up and down a lot on either side)? Well, it was. Very exhausting. I am trying to ignore that little 4 and 5 year olds had no problem with it.

Part II.

Work is a nightmare. My boss is gone, my co-worker is on vacation. I don't get paid enough for this!

Part III.

After two wonderful weeks, Miss Sadie once again left me for life in the States. Almost as terrible as the first time she did it a few years back.

Feeling the love

2009-02-15T17:00:00.004-04:00

This one here is a tribute to Pat and Gary Cail who renewed their vows after 30+ years of marriage, along with many other couples, at Trunk Bay on 14 February 2009. It was really touching. Like a lot of couples, marriage can go through a lot of ups and downs, so reaffirming those 'I do's' had a special meaning. Note the man in the small swimsuit in the background. I wish we had a better shot of his ridiculousness. I am cruel. So much for Valentine lovin'.

Who are the people in your neighborhood?

2009-02-09T21:51:00.004-04:00

One of my closest island friends and also, fortunately, my downstairs neighbor......Tyler (he made an appearance in my first post)! I like the very appropriate subtle appearance of Kenny sitting at the bar in the background. I find myself at Gecko Gazebo with Tyler several times a week.

http://www.on-stjohn.com/2009/02/09/our-favorite-bartenders-tyler/

4 Years

2009-01-31T14:08:00.004-04:00

As of a few days ago, I have officially been living on St. John for 4 years. In commemoration, I am throwing down some pics of my mainland friends who've spent time here with me. There are definitely a few missing (like Tim and Laurie...can't find the pics!), but you guys are all totally rad for coming to visit your isolated island friend. It's not easy being so far away. xoxo

My girls...Joy and Jacynth at the Quiet Mon. Wild times on that trip!

Zimbo and me. Sorry about the sideways, but it was straight in my picture file so I don't know what happend.

Jean and Sadie at Hawksnest. My partners in crime that left me for the stateside life.

First visitor prize! Lynette and Julie. Good ol' Wyoming gals.

A typically odd picture of Jason that I just had to stick in.

Alas...

2009-01-22T17:48:00.005-04:00

Yeah, not much from me lately. Just don't want to bore my 2 readers with stories about idiotic tourists and daily work life. But here are a few notes of interest...

-Sadie is coming to visit! And so is my mom! 2 weeks each, and it will rock. Even if our 'hallway' gets a bit cramped.

-Bought tickets to Lani's wedding in Alaska this summer, which will be amazing to enjoy during the solstice. BTW Lando...not sure if you were serious about me giving the speech, but I'm coming up with sort of a 'Cheers/speech' instead, which would be a little more my style and less nerve-racking. Also get to hang with cousin Ryan and little Will and do all sorts of outdoorsy things which Alaska is known for. Cannot wait!

-I am once again on the gala committee for the Friends of the Virgin Islands National Park. This year, the party is at the MOST exclusive villa on St. John that was just listed for sale for $32 million. It will be fabulous and fun, and rest assured, I will be drinking my share and more of Veuve Clicquot. Here's a link to the villa, Presidio del Mar, which also rents for $4,600 a night!

-Barack Obama is president, and I really did not realize I would be so thrilled!

-I just bought a king size Heavenly bed set, which for anyone who is stayed at a Sheraton/Weston/W/St. Regis understands it is the most amazing bed EVER. Thank god for work discounts saving me a good thousand off the price.

-Seems as though I will be summering in Seattle. I am glowing with anticipation of the gorgeous NW and all my friends. And the music scene. And the affordable groceries. And and and.....

-Just in case you think everything is coming up roses, there are those pesky tourists again. I really can't stand them. Seriously. They walk down the middle of the road, they don't seem to realize that they are OUTSIDE the U.S. and not everything is 'perfect' like their beloved country, they think they're the only people who exist in the whole universe, they wear stupid clothes, they drive on the wrong side of the road, they act as if they're getting drunk for the first time, they are disrespectful of local culture. I could keep going, but won't.

Instead, I leave you with these. Pics from my December trip w/ co-workers to Coral World on St. Thomas, where we played w/ sealions and got stung by some nasty old jellyfish. Love the pic w/ Jamie getting the sealion face slap.

A Holly Jolly Holly-day from STJ

2008-12-23T17:15:00.002-04:00

West Indian Delight

2008-12-21T15:04:00.001-04:00

Dinner last night:

Jason had mutton curry.
I wanted stewed oxtail, but they were out so I got fungi, goat water, and johnny cakes.

Love me some West Indian food.

Of glow sticks and whistling tea kettles

2008-12-15T17:40:00.002-04:00

SHE'S BAAAAAACK. I heard the voice, Jason heard the voice. We could no longer live in denial when I saw the bright white outfit with neon accessories. Old Lady Candy Raver is here for season. Argh.

Before she moved in next door, she was simply the nutty and sweet old lady who dressed like a six year old with flourescent pink and green pigtails. But last season when she moved in next door and started singing loud church songs and letting her tea kettle whistle for upwards of half an hour (thought we might need to go poke her with a stick to see if she was still alive), it became much less funny and way more real. She saw Jason and I getting into our car yesterday and asked us if we were going to church. NO. And she was wearing white socks with psychadelic bright birkenstocks. I usually pick up hitch-hikers (with exception), but when I saw her this past Saturday I drove right on by and said "HELL NO" out loud twice.

Anatomy of an island weekend

2008-12-11T16:50:00.007-04:00

Yes, the next weekend is nearly upon me once again. It will be filled with more parties than I can really comprehend at this point...more than I WANT to comprehend. But let me give a glimpse at last weekend. I realize that it may sound cool or exotic and exciting, but to me--after having lived here for 4 years--I would rather be chilling with my homies in Seattle and drinking a Pabst. Behold the apparent glory of last weekend...

Friday night...Sunset cruise with work. Complete with apps and an open bar. An Irish Car Bomb taken like an expert so that I would look cool in front of my co-workers sent me home to bed quite early (thankfully).

Saturday...attempt at recovery from previous night. Christmas parade which is unlike any Christmas parade in the States...pan music, trucks with loud Soca music, everyone in the community thinking they are part of the parade with drinks and children in tow. This was followed by a great holiday jazz concert in the park, where I was literally shaking from the cold (78ish degrees...pathetic).

Sunday...day 2 of hangover. Head off to a nearby island on a boat full of people to celebrate Captain Phil's 70th birthday. The island, Lovango, is really amazing...totally self-sufficient and off-the-grid, with 1 car and steep trails to houses. This is what is pictured below.

This here is a pic that only Virgin Islanders can totally appreciate. Wally has an amazing self-sufficient home, and this is its control center...fondly referred to as WAPA. hahaha. (that is the corrupt and defunct local power provider)

This one goes out to Theo...the chickens reside in the Pecker Palace or Pollo Club. Love it.

Captain Phil's birthday "potty", a gift for his new home.

View from the porch, with beautiful St. John in the background.

All of us packing on to Dan Boyd's boat for the short ride.

Is this a hibiscus? Whatever it is, the colours are amazing.

Welcome to the world

2008-12-10T16:54:00.000-04:00

Sydney Joy Anderson! My oldest and dearest friend (and one of the 3 people I have told of this blog), Rainey, just had her 3rd precious little baby on Dec. 4th. At 31, I think I'm actually starting to think the baby thing should happen before too long (we're still talking YEARS, but it's all relative, right?). Can't wait to meet the beautiful whippersnapper.

Thankspigging

2008-11-30T14:44:00.004-04:00

Games, drinks, and plenty of food with our friend Nancy.

This Ham is your Ham...This Ham is my Ham!

This Ham was made for you and me!!!!

A pictorial update

2008-11-23T17:32:00.003-04:00

Check out these flowers. It's just one big round petal. I thought it was pretty cool. Our neighbor Tyler has had another plant spending spree to make his porch and yard into a little tropical haven, and even though the pic is kind of crummy, I thought it was pretty cool.

And here is our teeny little lizard that was temporarily living in the bathroom. He was so damn cute, but alas, he had to be captured and released. No, I am not shaving him...just for size perspective.

So there is my thrilling update. At the moment I am excited because Jason went to St. Thomas with a few of our girlfriends and has decided to stay the night over there and go to a party. That means I get the place all to myself! Just bought a frozen pizza, Perrier, and going to settle down to a movie. That's a good night!

My version of extending an olive branch

2008-11-22T10:31:00.002-04:00

I saw Jason's old boss--the one Jason has nearly put out of a job by starting a competing business--with his wife at a cocktail party last night. It's always a little bit awkward seeing them, but since his wife is pregnant, I thought I'd go congratulate them. Here is the part where my idiocy really shines through. I told Will that he was going to be a great dad, that he would "totally kill it". Yes, I told him he would kill his baby. Moral of the story...do not use "kill it" as a compliment when talking about someone's unborn child. To their credit, they laughed it off.

Sunny with a chance of more sun

2008-11-18T21:53:00.003-04:00

I just realized today that the worst weather I will have seen in nearly two years occurred during August in Seattle. Weird, eh? I went completely unprepared with only flip flops, jeans, and lightweight long-sleeved shirts. This was definitely not adequate at the outdoor Radiohead concert that felt like the middle of winter to a gal accustomed to tropical living.

As for St. John weather, it is still hanging tight in the mid-upper 80s. It'll get a little "chilly" around the end of December and through February. By "chilly", I mean low 80s, possibly reaching as low as the 70s. I am so acclimated to the climate here that it actually does seem cold. Hard to believe. I continually wonder if I'll go into shock when I move back to Seattle. Seems likely.

Please enlighten me

2008-11-08T18:43:00.001-04:00

I am so weirded out/confused. My friend Nancy and I were driving along this afternoon when we came across an older guy running. He had a whip in his right hand, and would occasionally hit himself in the behind. Um, what is that about?

Bye Lindy...a stolen picture

2008-11-06T18:40:00.002-04:00

He's looking pretty coherent here. Man, people are sad he's gone. I did read a comment that his immune system should be studied. That is so true! For someone to live so long with such a lifestyle and illness, it is amazing. Although he didn't talk much in the nearly 4 years I've known him, there's no doubt that there was a lot of interesting things going on in his mind.

Swinging Doors

2008-11-05T16:27:00.003-04:00

Yays and Nays galore in life.

Major HUGE YAAAAY to Obama becoming president. This is definitely a great moment in our nation's history.

Another Yay to a great Halloween weekend, including a Saturday night house party at our friend Jim Weller's newly built home. He is a master woodcrafter and has done the most exquisite job on this place he's built from scratch. I am totally coveting it.

Major serious NAY to everyone's favorite island personality, Lindy, dying yesterday. I cannot even attempt to explain this character, but he was adored by all. Sadly, he'd been circling the drain for awhile, so this is really no surprise. He may have the biggest funeral St. John has ever seen. He was everyone's Lindy.

Nay also to the fact that I have encountered the 2 most repugnant smells EVER today. I am not being at all melodramatic. They were permeate-your-nostril-and-stick-like-herpes bad.

Life is such a roller coaster.

Today at work

2008-10-30T20:54:00.004-04:00

Laid off 4 of my fellow employees/friends (3 more the previous day...mind you, HUGE corporation, very small St. John division).

Had to track down one fellow employee/friend at a bar to drag her home so she can fly to the states for rehab tomorrow

Nothing I can explain in a few words can tell the full madness of today, but let's just say I discovered a wonderful Oregon Pinot to get me through...Argyle. Affordable, and delicious, and necessary.

Only for you, Ms. Rainey Jean

2008-10-27T17:10:00.004-04:00

A Tagged entry...

8 Favorite TV shows:
1. The Daily Show w/ Jon Stewart
2. Passions (campy and wonderful)
3. Various Reality (Project Runway for one)
4. Curb Your Enthusiasm and other HBO series
5. Here is where things get shady as I don't have TV....um...Family Guy
6. Adult Swim shows on Comedy Central
7. BBC World News
8. Sorry, can't think of any more

8 Favorite Restaurants:
1. Cafe Roma
2. India Mahal (Tacoma rocks the Indian food)
3. Rhumblines
4. Tup Tim Thai
5. That one Sushi restaurant in my Seattle neighborhood that I am currently blanking on
6. The Mecca
7. The Breadboard
8. Dash Inn

8 Things that happend yesterday:
1. Had brunch at Sun Dog Cafe with our favorite bartender and friend, Tyler
2. Did a shot of Liquid Cocaine with said brunch
3. Read my current book, THE BOOK THIEF (Love it!)
4. Went to a pig roast at my favorite secret West Indian bar on St. John, where we did not, in fact, eat any pig
5. Drank a few IPAs at the Tap Room while eating Beef Carpaccio and a gorgonzola salad from neighboring Paradiso
6. Watched a really stupid movie, PINEAPPLE EXPRESS (don't waste your life)
7. Lounged on my futon on our screened-in-porch on a lovely 85 degree-ish afternoon
8. Made way more plans for next weekend than I am capable of actually attending

8 Things I am looking forward to:
1. Next weekend
2. Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays (even though I'm stuck on St. John)
3. Moving back to Seattle
4. Getting rich
5. Getting a puppy baby
6. Getting back to the job I love in Seattle
7. Our big Asian adventure (hopefully next year)
8. Next boat trip

4 Jobs that I've had:
1. Mini-golf/Ice-cream parlor (definitely good times, Rainey, but for whatever reason I don't really like ice-cream anymore, and I DEFINITELY do not like mini-golf)
2. Production Coordinator at a commercial photography studio (first real job, and still the most stressful I've had)
3. Matchmaker/Sales Coordinator at Dating Service (ahhhh...the stories I can tell)
4. Sales at Kasala Furniture in Seattle (BEST JOB EVER!!!!)

4 Movies I've watched more than once:
1. Six Degrees of Separation
2. The Sound of Music
3. Emmet Otter's Jugband Christmas
4. Titanic (WHY??? I HATE this film)

4 TV shows I watch:

Uh...there's one...The Daily Show. OH! I guess sometimes the new 90210 and Entourage.

4 Favorite Foods:
1. Tim's Cascades Jalapeno Chips
2. Rajun Cajun Sandwich
3. Indo fries with aoli
4. Enchiladas

4 Places I want to visit:

1. All over Africa
2. All over Asia
3. All over South America
4. Australia and New Zealand

4 Things I love about my significant other:
1. He's funny
2. Smart
3. Ambitious
4. We want the same things in life

All done! (brushing off hands)

Hurricane Omar

2008-10-19T14:17:00.003-04:00

After all was said and done, Hurricane Omar did pretty minimal damage on St. John...downed trees, one lost home, some screwed up boats, a 2 day hangover from drinking 1 and a half LARGE bottles of wine by myself (thank God for the Westin's heavenly beds). But it was certainly an interesting experience with the anticipation of what could happen. We got to spend quality time with our new neighbors who'd only moved here 2 days prior, and get some serious perspective from my co-worker and his wife who also stayed with us because the boat they'd lived on for 20ish years was in the harbor. Can you imagine that stress?? There was flooding on St. John like I couldn't believe, and SO MUCH WORK to get everything ready, just in case. There was one point where I ran to my apartment to get a change of clothes and just looked around at all my stuff and said, "Screw it." All replaceable, although I would have been devastated. The whole event was the closest this island has seen to a hurricane since the tragic Marilyn in '96 (?), so everyone has a new story to tell and an appreciation for good weather.

Lovely Phoebe, one of the two little dogs that kept us entertained

What we did a good portion of the night--watch the hurricane's track

Beautiful weather less than 24 hours later

At the moment...

2008-10-15T14:17:00.001-04:00

Hunkered down in a two bedroom Westin villa. SWEET! Drinking a glass of wine and watching it RAIN, RAIN, RAIN. Look at this thing headed for us!

http://www.ssd.noaa.gov/goes/flt/t2/loop-wv.html

Yowza. Should be interesting.

Hurricanes are such an inconvenience

2008-10-14T17:55:00.003-04:00

Well, I'm getting my first official hurricane tomorrow night, if all goes as planned. Hurricane Omar. What this means at this point is a Category 2 will be upon us late tomorrow night...lots of rain and wind. Sadly, my home does not hold up well. I REALLY, REALLY do NOT want to have to pack up all my belongings and head for safe cover. That does not sound at all fun to me. It is a bit incomprehensible for me to be looking around my small and sparsely filled apartment and think about choosing which of my meager possessions will make the safe journey with me. Eh! Hold thumbs that the storm will peter out.

Love to Love City

2008-10-09T16:36:00.004-04:00

As much as I bitch and moan about living here, I have to admit that I am pretty lucky to have the experience of living in "Paradise". I mean, this is the life people dream of, right? After a great weekend of hiking with Jason and my friend Nancy, and house sitting at our usual place (view above), I thought it would be nice to make a list of pros of living in "Love City" St. John. It is a special and unique experience that I'm sure I'll look back on fondly...some day.

So here it is. A list of positives:

-Scenery. Hard to beat it.
-Temperature. Ooh lala. I am sooo spoiled.
-Environmental awareness. Living in such a small, pristine environment, with about 75% National Park, really makes a community come together to maintain its coral reefs, beaches, and forests (at least SOME of the community). And I have learned an invaluable amount about water conservation. It literally hurts me to see someone running water wastefully in the states now.
-Drinks EVERYWHERE! No liquor laws. Take your drinks to the streets, into the stores, into other bars, into cars, NO ONE CARES!! Even the cops drink on duty while driving around. And don't freak over the drinking and driving. There are rarely accidents since the max you can drive on these narrow winding roads is about 25 mph.
-Boat trips. The absolute most important reason I enjoy myself living here is getting out on the water and enjoying other islands. It is like a whole vacation in one day.
-Knowing everyone. Has its ups and downs for a gal who likes her big city anonymity, but it is nice to be in a place where everyone knows your name.
-Iguanas. Boy is it a bummer to run over these big lizards, but they really are stupid--yet wonderful.
-Strong, cheap drinks. Back to alcohol. It is unbelievably cheap.
-Thunderstorms. I thought we had good ones growing up in WYO, but they are unbelievable here, echoing off the steep hills. No comparison.
-Gnips and tamarinds. It is nice to live in a place where at any given time you can just pull a healthy tasty treat off a tree.
-Flamboyants. I think it is my favorite tree...when in bloom.
-Amazing beaches. Seriously now. I am so lucky. So spoiled. There are a lot of well traveled people around here, and apparently the only comparable beaches are in Bali (or was it Fiji?), where I have yet to go. When people think Hawaii beaches are nice, I chuckle to myself and feel highly superior.
-Nighttime chorus of frogs, insects and birds. The best sound to listen to when the barge dock and town below our apartment quiet down for the night.
-Indo fries with spicy aioli. Chicken gorgonzola and walnuts with ravioli. Vodka penne with sausage. Seared fresh tuna. I am a foody, and when I leave there are definitely places I will crave. Mouth watering.
-Last but hardly least, the reason for loving 'Love City', is because this is where I met my love...just after moving here nearly 4 years ago, Jason and I instantly became best friends. The rest is history.

Crying inside

2008-09-30T16:51:00.002-04:00

Just finished off the last bag of Tim's Cascades Jalapeno Chips that Jason brought back to me from Seattle. Oh how I love those chips and my burning face after munching it down to the crumbly crumbs (eating these is honestly a true passion of mine in life). My personal charity is now accepting donations...send directly to the Virgin Islands. And get that package insured.

One more thing

2008-09-28T13:35:00.001-04:00

http://www.factcheck.org/elections-2008/factchecking_debate_no_1.html

Seems to be a very impartial check of what the political candidates have to say during their debate. Can't wait for Palin to talk. This website will have its work cut out.

What to do

2008-09-28T12:47:00.003-04:00

Jason has been bugging me about my lack of blogging. I have nothing really to say! Jason suggests maybe talking about how my "friend" tried to make out with me while Jason was out of the room TWICE last weekend. Nah. No thanks. Don't want to relive that again. Or maybe I could talk about my wasted employee party complete with inappropriate story-sharing. Again...no.

Instead I will share some of my favorite internet finds as of late...

http://www.geekologie.com/2008/09/awesomest_jesusbased_song_ever.php

The above will make you laugh hysterically and get stuck in your head for a long, long time.

This picture, I just love, compliments of Cute Overload:

And finally, please track down Bill Clinton's recent appearance on Jon Stewart. I've never heard Jon with so little to say. No matter your feelings on Bill, he totally killed it. Please bring us back an economic and environmental powerhouse as president!

Stormin'

2008-09-22T17:18:00.002-04:00

Since I really have nothing to say, I thought I would post a picture that would remind me of happier times...sunnier times. It has been raining for the past few days. A storm is forming above us. Last time I remember it being so wet, our tropical rain turned into Hurricane Katrina. Hopefully that won't happen this time. This is the time of year I want to be at the beach...the water is glassy and warm and the tourists are mostly gone. I've been spoiled, obviously.

Rawk and roll rodeo

2008-09-07T19:58:00.003-04:00

Well, a month later here are a few pics of Wyoming. Good times, very tiring. How will I ever deal with kids of my own when my nephews and niece wear me out so much. It was great to finally meet little Allison, my cousin Stacey's little girl. She was such a sweet little girl compared to her boy cousins who were rowdy and wrestling, but they all really loved each other. Eli got the cast off his broken leg the day after I arrived, and he is talking a lot more and LOVES to run and wrestle. And sooooo cute in those thick glasses with his long eyelashes pressed up against the glass. Landon was so excited about starting kindergarten that he was waking up at 4 am and asking if he could go to school each day. He is a very witty and loving little boy. I love to take naps with him because he still cuddles up and rubs my thumb, just like when he was a baby.

Also big ups to Miss Sadie who drove all the way from Idaho to hang out with me what amounted to about 1 day. But one GREAT day as we enjoyed the parade and debauchery that occurs around Fair and Rodeo in small town Wyoming.

With my sweet Sadie at the Century Club

The Munchkins...Landon, Allison, and Eli

Hypocrisy at its finest

2008-09-05T15:10:00.003-04:00

Check out the clip from the Daily Show about Palin. It is not so much about Palin (who, as a VP choice should certainly be mocked), as it is about the idiotic reporters who should really check themselves before throwing out their opinions. Oy vey. They must have some short term memory.

http://perezhilton.com/2008-09-04-stewart-on-palin

Pondering

2008-09-01T17:00:00.003-04:00

Why would one pour milk into his eye?

Why would one stand in a grocery store, open a jug of milk, pour milk into the cap, and put it in his eye?

I made sure he purchased said milk and didn't put it back on the shelf.

Itchin'

2008-08-29T20:46:00.003-04:00

The mosquitos here are bad. Beyond bad. I have been fairly lucky to avoid what most people are dealing with, due to a somewhat windy home and indoor work, but still...not good. Imagine just walking through a thick cloud of mossies. Wyo never knew the extent. I would count my bites, but that may get boring. If I were to guess, I would say around 60. I used to count, but that was when I was new to tropical life. Now I just try to refrain from itching so that they don't turn into big nasty sores. A little On St. John blog...

http://www.on-stjohn.com/2008/08/26/mosquito-bite-looks-like-st-john/

I heart Seattle

2008-08-28T17:38:00.007-04:00

Long time no write. Luckily, I had a prolonged visit to Seattle due to a canceled flight, which allowed me to get to a Radiohead show and see about 10 more friends than I would've had I flown home on time. I had a fabulous time hanging out with the best friends a girl could ask for and going to Tim and Laurie's wedding. A few highlights (more than a few--it was hard to narrow)...

Me and my girls at Timmy's wedding

Jason and Mike chilling before the wedding

Beautiful lakeside wedding vows

Victoria with her little doll, Pilar

Joy and I hanging with James in the LQA

We love our Ragin' Cajun sandwiches

Hanging al fresco at Mike's

So long since we've shown love to our Seth

Some of my favorite people in the world...all in one place again!

Timmy and his ladies, pre-wedding

Yes!

2008-08-04T14:34:00.002-04:00

This is brilliant. I think I need to get in some serious practice time over the next week just in case I end up at Neighbors again when I get to Seattle.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyqUj3PGHv4

Hustling off to Buffalo

2008-08-02T16:17:00.003-04:00

Leaving Monday on a 2 week vacation and I cannot wait. The old home town of Buffalo, Wyoming to hang with the family during Fair and Rodeo week, then to Seattle with all my favorite homies for my dear friend Tim Morelli's wedding. Good times ahead. Here are some pics of my nephews from when I visited last summer. These are certainly better than looking at dead lizards. Landon is now 5 years old and is the class clown and very smart and funny. Eli was 9 months old in these pictures and was just starting to walk around without help a year ago. Now he is such a loving and rowdy little boy. He'll be getting a cast off his broken leg the morning after I arrive. Wild children. Pics from vacation will be posted in a few weeks.

For your viewing pleasure

2008-07-30T21:42:00.001-04:00

See photo descriptions in next post. Sorry for any gag reflexes.

My 30 years never prepared me for this housesitting job

2008-07-30T20:48:00.003-04:00

I am exhausted due to my new job, and well, also due to the fact that I woke up at around 3 am last night with my face being eaten by ants. Not kidding. It happened to Jason the night before, but he got it even worse. Let's just say we are in the midst of housesitting for one of the most ant and cockroach infested places ever. It is not that our out-of-town friend is a mess, it's just that in this tropical locale, bugs can move in and aren't too keen on moving out.

My admiration for my dear Jason has really reached a new level as of late. I think he has killed around 15 huge cockroaches and an innumerable amount of small ones, carried away dead lizard bodies and a dead rat (thanks for the presents kitties), and just all around stepped up to the challenge of staying in a place where we are outnumbered by some very pesky and bold creatures.

I have been chased down by a super-sized insect while screaming and jumping in a small bathroom and seen one of the cats play hacky sack and then chomp down on a cute little baby mouse in the living room, but at least I have interesting stories to tell my co-workers each morning.

Now I am rambling. I wanted to share 2 disgusting pictures of dead lizards--one from tonight that the ants were just starting to invade, and one from the other night that was reduced to its skeleton--but my computer isn't wanting to upload them. Another day.

I may go vomit.

Whaaaaaa

2008-07-26T12:37:00.000-04:00

Once again crying inside because I don't live in Seattle

http://www.bumbershoot.org/lineup.htm

Know when to say 'When'

2008-07-24T16:21:00.003-04:00

Several glasses of wine before a dinner with my friend Crystal, where we then drank a bottle of Prosecco and another big glass of Merlot, was a bad idea. Usually, not a problem. Jason showed up toward the end of the evening, which is when my brain got a little hazy. Not too many people left in the restaurant, but I still managed to make an idiot of myself when I loudly proclaimed, "I'm going to RAPE YOUR BALLS!"

The only table with people seated was right next to us. A tourist family with 2 little kids. Jason pointed that out to me, and I proceeded to say, "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" As in...Oh no, why did I say something so offensive in front of this poor family, but I am now being even more offensive. Sheesh. With my luck they were guests here at the Westin, which I see a lot of them around town quite regularly. I don't really remember this, but was fortunate enough to not have a hangover the next day. Praise the sweet baby Jesus. I know the locals in my company will forgive me, since they are all a bigger mess than myself.

Please, show some mercy!

2008-07-19T13:05:00.002-04:00

I am becoming afraid of the unthinkable...another Republican Whitehouse. Nightmarish, right? But also a possible reality. I am begging and pleading and will even consider sexual favors for anyone who is complacent about voting to get out there and support Obama, if for no other reason than to not support McCain. THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT. The downward spiral must cease. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE. Favors granted upon request.

Maybe it's just me

2008-07-17T09:45:00.002-04:00

I keep seeing this lady around town that I long took to be an "old" (50s or 60s) drunk. Well, she is now pregnant. And still drunk and smoking like a chimney. Any thoughts about that unborn baby? And how did she get pregnant at her age?!

Another person I know is smoking weed the whole time she is pregnant. I know we kinda tend to think of marijuana as null and void, but it is not great for you lungs (the poor babies?). A stoned fetus! Why chance it? I am amazed and disturbed.

When I lose my mind...

2008-07-16T11:43:00.004-04:00

I want to be just like Roland! He is my favorite homeless drunk crazy person ever. He loves to wear costumes and completely absorb himself into their respective roles. It makes me giddy with anticipation of all the possibilities when my senses begin to falter. Here is one gem as him of a pimp. Sadly, I think I accidentally erased the others. Such as him dressed as a wizard, at one point carrying around a huge book of Shakespeare which he dramatically read in the middle of the park, and at another point held a huge silver tray, arms outstretched as though he was casting a spell while following behind one of the most decrepit slow-moving homeless old person I've ever seen (that's another story in itself...old unwashed sailor with a rotting leg who thought he was Jesus and only wore a wetsuit). He also loves to chat away to his imaginary friends on an old phone attached by its cord somewhere on his pants. I could go on and on, but maybe I'll just have to try to find some more pictures. What a character.

Christmas in July

2008-07-14T11:56:00.006-04:00

Always nice to do a little something different for a change. We spent yesterday hanging out at a "Christmas" party overlooking Coral Bay. Met a lot of people (such a small island...no clue there were so many I didn't know), serious potluck eating, Christmasy fun watching Emmet Otter's Jug Band Christmas (a personal favorite since I was a wee thing), swimming, drinking (of course).

I am soooo excited that we got invited to a party in September for a British guy in Coral Bay who will be made a lord and Duke (Lord Maunder of Hillborough, Duke of Beltinge to be exact). It will be a 300 or so person party where he has to build a bridge and heard 4 sheep over it. Random! Sounds like a good time to me.

There were two distinct groups of kids and old people (we realized that when we were discussing the adults showing up, that we actually qualify as adults ourselves, being in our 30s and all). Randomly at the small party...3 Nasa scientists who did not previously know one another. Also cool to hear people getting introduced and having a *ding* moment of realizing that my peers are really cool people that all own their own successful businesses...Jason with his computer biz and publishing company, Cheech and Kevin with their successful brewery, Colette with her ice cream shop. Nice to see people pursuing their passions and doing well instead of living the cubicle life.

Knew the party was over when a tourist showed up and proceeded to get into the hot tub naked with us (we were wearing proper bathing suit attire) while he ate a plate full of food. Time to go.

A big thanks with hugs and kisses to the Doves for hosting such a great time at one of their beautiful properties.

A view of Coral Bay and the BVIs in the distance

So thrilled about my Christmas present...a denim pouch

Great view from the pool

Rooney and Colette so happy together

Ick take 2

2008-07-11T09:57:00.002-04:00

More gross than mooshing cockroaches with your finger? The gladiator sandal trend. Ew.

Ick

2008-07-01T14:38:00.003-04:00

We've had a bit of a roach infestation at the restaurant where I "work" (drink wine, hang out, eat good food) one night a week. No real surprise here in the tropics. But I definitely reached a whole new level the other night. Tourists just don't really get the whole bug thing, you know? As I was seating a couple a roach was on their table. I quickly mooshed it with my finger and freaked out and started wiping it on the underside of the table. I know they didn't notice, and I'm hoping no other customers were looking either. In the few years I've lived here, I've killed a number of ants and small spiders with my bare fingers, but a cockroach? Yuck. Hopefully that will be the last time.

That time of year

2008-06-26T12:16:00.002-04:00

Carnival time on St. John. Anyone familiar with the Caribbean knows that each island has its own Carnival at a certain time every year, and these are BIG BIG deals. I think the most popular would be in Trinidad or Brazil, but it's enough to get little St. John worked into a frenzy as well.

Jason and I hit up the food fair on Sunday for some chicken roti, conch, macaroni and cheese and steamed veggies. Classic West Indian fare.

I admit to being a little sad because I managed to miss the one thing I've never been to in these years...a pageant. Pageants are HUGE down here. If you are a winner, it may be the highlight of your entire life. Seriously. Even though the island is only about 4,000 people and your competition only 2 other girls. But man do they put in the effort for a long (3+ hours) show.

And of course, since I have to work on July 4th-our main celebratory day here on STJ-I will not be able to partake in my favorite part...the parade. It is not much of a parade, admittedly. It is completely island style, getting started around an hour or 2 late each time, but it doesn't matter. The streets are crowded with people and it's an all day party (there are no liquor laws down here, so its free-flowin', cheap, strong, and everywhere). The parade lasts 4 or 5 hours with floats coming through maybe every 45 minutes. Ah island life. And I am definitely not making it up at 4am for J'ouvert. Did that a few years ago, sobered up and went to work. Once is enough for me.

Definitely looking forward to more good food and live music in the nights to come. On a little island where not much happens, it is good to have something going on.

Pukes

2008-06-23T14:35:00.002-04:00

Pukes is the nickname for tourists in Alaska, which I always thought sounded a bit harsh, although funny. They are our livelihood after all. At any rate, it is the time of year when I am ready to have a break from dealing with their idiocy. I came to realize on my recent cruise ship vacation that living down here has really helped me understand the unwritten rules in Caribbean travel. Fortunately I was able to avoid the usual faux pas (not covering swimwear in public, not saying a greeting before asking questions like 'where's the bathroom?', walking in the middle of the road, etc.). But I've had two recent experiences with moron tourists who definitely earned the term pukes that I felt were worth writing about.

The other night at the Westin I had a guy come up to me and say "I've been at the beach all day, and I get back to my villa, and my room key doesn't work! Do you understand how awful this is??"

I was having a hard time figuring out if he was joking or not, so I say I'm sorry and direct him to the lobby front desk where he can get it fixed, but the guy is not shutting up. The more he says the more I can't figure out if he is joking or not. "Do you understand that I've been at the beach ALL DAY, and my room key doesn't work??!! This is traumatic. This is INCREDIBLY traumatizing! This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me in my life!" Me sitting and nodding and trying to decide whether or not to laugh. I felt like saying, "Well, you must have an amazing life if this is the worst you've ever dealt with." I'm glad I didn't laugh, because I'm pretty sure he was very serious, but come on now! People live in such weird realities.

The other situation came from a man who obviously knew little to nothing about the world outside his suburb in Middle America. He asked me why there were so many Jamaicans here. Do you see where this is going? At first I didn't get it. I said I really didn't know any Jamaicans...maybe one. How did he manage to meet so many Jamaicans? He says, "They're everywhere! You know? The black people?" Oh. I began to get afraid that this was what he was thinking. WHAT AN IDIOT!!! How is he not aware that the Caribbean, ANY Caribbean island, is mainly inhabited with people of African descent? They're all from Jamaica? That was definitely the dumbest thing I may have ever heard...maybe worse than people asking how the islands don't bump into each other while they're floating around or any of a gazillion other stupid puke questions. I think I gave him a brief history on the West Indian culture, but pretty much decided that beyond that I could not speak with him any more.

These are the days of my life.

Pet Peeves du jour

2008-06-17T16:56:00.003-04:00

As an anal retentive Virgo, there are a lot of little nuances in life that make me cringe. That does not come as a surprise to those who know me. Now I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but there are a few bathroom accessories (or whatever you want to call them) that I find absolutely offensive. Keep in mind, I am from Wyoming and have no place to talk about class, but...eh...I am going to.

Bathroom offense #1: padded toilet seats. Why do these exist? My butt is afraid to sit on these.

Bathroom offense #2: Furry toilet seat covers and toilet rug things. I am just so disgusted at the potential for hair in these. It is like a breeding ground for filth. And they are completely unnecessary while also being completely ugly.

Bathroom offense #3: blue toilet water. Good for you. You keep your toilet clean. But something is totally not right with blue toilet water. It seems toxic and nasty. A good scrub every few days seems to do the trick for me!

That is all for now.

Just another day in paradise

2008-06-16T15:04:00.005-04:00

A big thanks to Captain Kevin of Born to Rhumb for providing the boat, and to the Connections ladies who decided that Jason and I are now part of their family, and thus were able to enjoy a day trip to Jost Van Dyke in the British Virgin Islands. We were the youngest by quite a few years, so we were also the drunkest. Although we hit a lot of the same spots as on our last boat trip (Foxy's Taboo, the bubbling pool), I was thrilled to get to Ivan's as I had never actually been there before and was friends with his son Bully before he died a few years back. What an amazing spot he has! Boat trips are one thing I will really miss when I eventually move from here. Check the pics...
Jason striking a pose on the tire swing at Ivan's.

I love this place...shells and coral on any and all surfaces

A cat that is really into eating mayo

Cool conch entrance at Ivan's
The bubbling pool, Jason and his harem

A seaweed toupe

The nice warm water in front of Ivan's and our boat in the background

I like the botton sentence...at Foxy's while checking in at customs

World Famous Foxy'sMangroves on our walk to the bubbling pool

Hot hot hot!

2008-06-14T15:28:00.005-04:00

Well, it is that time of year. Is it summer yet? The seasons all pretty much run together around here in the tropics, except that it is starting to get REALLY WARM. I remember when I moved here in January of 2005 and laughed when some of the locals warned me how much hotter it would get, but now I'm living it once again. Not till November will there be any relief. It is so hot that I cannot sleep under covers and I still sweat all through the night (yuck), and when I'm awake...still sweating ALL THE TIME. If you want a little more perspective, think of how hot and muggy Florida may be, and then think that the Virgin Islands are a thousand miles south. A thousand miles closer to the Equator. Toasty.

But, on the up and up...this very moment is the beginning of my 3 day weekend with a boat trip tomorrow to the BVIs. AND, my work is going really well. Finally! I am back on the property at the Westin doing the marketing, and it is just sooo much more me. I can't believe I left this same job almost 2 years ago and it took me this long to get back into it. Only downside is customer service. I hate customer service. And when you work at a 5 star resort where people come down from the states expecting stateside service, there are a lot of issues to deal with. I feel like yelling at people sometimes...CHILL OUT! Go get a drink and it will all be okay! I could rant on tourists for a long time, but I will refrain for the moment. Time for a nap to get this weekend off to the right start.

I knew it.

2008-06-09T16:27:00.003-04:00

That little map thing in the margin of my page is useless. I always had an inkling that it was. Today the list of places from which my site has been visited is so ridiculously out of whack. Belgium? Brazil? Germany? Mexico? Turkey? China? Chile? Seriously doubtful that I have that kind of popularity. Not even 90% of my friends and family know I have this blog. Stupid map thing.

A Sunset Cruise is always nice

2008-06-09T11:57:00.004-04:00

There was not much of a sunset (view looking toward St. Thomas), but here are a few photos from our little boat trip last Wednesday night. It is amazing how intoxicated one can get with only an hour and a half on a boat. Boat trip = Boozin'.

At this very moment II

2008-06-07T21:10:00.003-04:00

10 hours later...Mother has now assumed the role of child beater. At least Grandma's not still singing.

At this very moment

2008-06-07T10:56:00.002-04:00

Listening to my elderly West Indian neighbor belting out church songs (her porch is right outside my window). Only a few minutes ago she was screaming at and beating her little granddaughter who lives there. This is very typical.

Melt my little heart

2008-06-04T16:21:00.004-04:00

I just found out a former high school friend of mine and his wife adopted a baby. And it seems a bunch of their friends are doing the same! As adoption has been my biggest priority since I can remember (eh, dare I say elementary school?) for myself and for everyone, this makes me really excited. Now if I could just get the people I know who eventually will want kids on that same bandwagon...

Oh yeah

2008-06-02T15:11:00.003-04:00

I got my hair chopped. 6 inches! And bangs! I haven't had bangs since middle school, and they were a completely different animal then. I really am a short-haired girl at heart. Plus, it is getting too hot for anything long.

While we slept

2008-06-02T14:37:00.004-04:00

An epic battle for life ensued just feet from where we slept. How did we sleep through said battle? I say a big thanks to a large bottle of wine.

So what exactly happend? Well, many of my friends know that through the years our little apartment has been a bit of a critter super highway. When our latest rat visitor came over last week, we did what we always do...set up a plethora of traps. We got poison, old-fashion rat traps with peanut butter, and the little sticky paper thing (do not complain to me about being inhumane...rats deserve the slow death if it gets stuck on that thing).

Well...when we woke up this morning we saw the cupboard below the sink open and the rug all in a bunch with the dust pan and little hand broom stuck to the upside down sticky rat paper. The rat escaped from the sticky paper, but not with his tail. Ew. I guess if it comes down to gnawing your own tail off to survive, you just do it.

Our apartment isn't much more than a hallway, so this all went down about 5 feet from our bed. Again, thank you red wine.

Mr. Rat may have escaped this time, but I know his days are numbered because he's been eating the poison. Fingers crossed that he dies outside and not in our cistern or behind our fridge.

A few vacation pics

2008-05-29T12:31:00.003-04:00

Jason after a waterslide landing

The Pitons on St. Lucia

Me getting drenched in a St. Lucia waterfall

We love dem rotis. At Roti King on Antigua.

Our view from the ships cheap seats.

White impression on arm from the plants

Jason playing in hot sulphur springs on Dominica

Most gorgeous rainbow ever on Dominica

Kenny's Birthday

2008-05-23T11:21:00.004-04:00

Well, if you refer back to the first post I ever wrote, you'll know that Tyler was trying to get monkeys for Kenny's birthday in Vegas. That didn't happen. Apparently monkey man was banned from the strip for his mistreatment of animals. And the Cher impersonator with a monkey was too expensive.

BUT...Tyler has an amazing birthday in store for his main squeeze! Seriously. Tyler is a bartender and thus tells his stories A LOT. He has made a lot of angry wives this week because he's shown that their husbands do not even come close to showing the care and creativity when giving gifts that Tyler does. If only we could all date/marry a gay man! When we were down at their apartment last night Kenny just sat their with his headphones on singing the same Cher song over and over again. Lucky guy.

So, aside from the fabulous Cher concert, they are taking a helicopter to the Grand Canyon for lunch and skydiving. I really had to question the whole skydiving idea. What are they thinking??!!

Tyler says it came about because he was looking around on the internet and had a credit card conveniently within grasp after who-knows-how-many cocktails.

He says, "I need a breathalizer on my computer." I think he does.

The Parade of Humanity here Folks

2008-05-19T21:32:00.005-04:00

"All I can say is 'Wow'," Kathie Lee Gifford, Carnival Cruise ship commercial

I don't know why I was surprised. Being on a cruise ship is like living the stereotype. It is a really weird feeling. Although Jason and I enjoyed ourselves, I don't think we are cut out for 'cruising'. To put it in perspective...it was like the diaspora that is KMart patrons and workers was all of a sudden afloat on a huge ship. Now I am no one to point fingers and call out trashiness. I grew up in the small town of Buffalo, Wyoming after all, but SERIOUSLY! They had an art show of Thomas Kincaid! I am almost embarrassed to admit that I even know who that is, with my Art History Major background, but I have gone to a mall, after all. The whole situation was almost shocking.

Our first dinner was with an elderly couple, Ron and Cecile. They were from Upstate New York (common answer). They gave us all sorts of hints on how to get the most for our buck on the vacation. This included the advice of pouring vodka into water bottles to bring on board (we did that), and taking pictures of the photos that they take in the photo gallery over the week so we wouldn't have to pay the inflated price for the actual copy (we did not do that). Ron proceeded to eat the most insane amount of food I've ever seen, which I soon realized was the 'cruise ship way'...several appetizers, several main course, repeat appetizers, repeat main courses. Sure, the food is free, but it is DISGUSTING. I think Jason and I were the only people on board that believed that. I actually made myself sick one morning because I woke up and started thinking about the food.

Our dinner companions for the rest of the trip were newlyweds Denny and Melody. Although very different from us, they were really awesome and entertaining. They were from Norfolk, VA (they called it NAWfuck). They were into their 6th cruise or so and thus very experienced. They also really enjoyed the food, and maybe thought Jason and I were a little crazy. But they were very great to spend a little time with, nonetheless.

A brief island synopsis:
Dominica...amazing! Everything we thought it would be and more. Definitely going back.
Barbados...sucks. Filthy, nasty beaches that looked beautiful before the closer take. Never go there.
St. Lucia...beautiful. No need to go back. It was nice, but we did all we really needed to that day.
St. Kitts...meh. A little disappointed. Not particularly nice beaches. Cute town area, but no need to visit again.
Antigua...seemed really charming, would like to see more but we were too lazy. Maybe a return visit some day. Maybe.

One thing that I can appreciate about this whole experience is this: I am very fortunate to live on St. John. The beaches here really are the most beautiful and clean. The island is mostly pristine thanks to the national park. And because it is a U.S. territory there is enough of a tourism industry that we don't have the poverty that Dominica and St. Lucia have. I was actually glad to come home! I can't believe I'm saying that!

So overall...good enough vacation, but won't be going on a cruise ship again.

What are you looking at SWAN? They made us towel animals every night.

This was the cheese plate at the wine bar. Believe it. Saltines with American, Cheddar and Swiss.

We kept ourselves entertained anyway.

Melody and Denny wearing their t-shirts with pride.

Confessed Hypocrite

2008-05-18T19:33:00.002-04:00

Although I completely disapprove of that bill that gives tax payers more money back, I will admit that the $600 just saved my ass. A pleasant surprise to my bank account. But I still hate George Bush and the powers (democrats and republicans) that let such blinding stupidity proliferate in our government.

Don't mind the fanny packs

2008-05-09T22:42:00.003-04:00

So Jason and I will be off on a Carnival cruise ship for the next week. Heading down island to Barbados, St. Kitts, St. Lucia, Antigua and Dominica. We also have a stop on St. Thomas, but that doesn't really count. People find it odd that we would go on this venture, and to be quite honest I never thought I'd see myself on one of those ships, especially when dealing on a daily basis with the shrivs wearing straw hats and black knee socks that order blended drinks and tip poorly. But here we are. It is a good and economic way to check out our neighbors to the south. AND I'm excited! We will be working on an exciting video, so stay tuned.

Hell on wheels

2008-05-06T13:49:00.003-04:00

I knew I was in trouble the other day when I offered a hitch-hiking drunken boatie from Coral Bay a ride and he refused. I saw him later in town and was like...You too good for my car?! Yes, of course he was. He may be a weathered old sailor, but he didn't want to risk his life by getting a ride in our quintessential island car. He told me I needed to have people sign waivers before getting in. I first thought that I might list things that are wrong with my car, but the list really is WAY too long. Just know that you better tell me how much you love and appreciate me, because at any given moment there are several ways I could die by being in this hunk of junk. A short list: the drivers seat is about to fall through the floor due to rust (our feet get splashed when we drive through puddles), the brakes are too rusty and stuck to be replaced (and we have some serious hills here), and our axel is so cracked it could literally be pulled apart. I have visions of something finally snapping and my little body careening off a cliff. So here are some pictures of my '95 Suzuki. Note the shrunken top, lack of windows, broken front passenger seat, ubiquitous rust, missing paint and dents, and OH! maybe 3 or 4 Christmas trees that have been in there for months.

The miracle that is frozen water

2008-04-29T18:02:00.002-04:00

Just got the most amazing zit-killer tip from a new island gal who is doing facials for the Ritz-Carlton on St. Thomas. Ice them puppies! No kidding. I swear it works immediately.

Poop

2008-04-25T16:29:00.004-04:00

So what happens when you find yourself in a job that you like, but you really suck at? And since this here job all comes down to numbers and I am not performing, then what? I guess I'm not that into the job, but what else am I supposed to do here...don't want to get into too deep of a commitment. I always tisked tisked the people you hear about that slave away at lame careers. Why don't they do something else? Now I know why. It's called being grown up. And making sacrifices for those we love. Mantra...it will all be over soon, there is a bigger picture (repeat 15,694 times).

Thou art a catchy phrase

2008-04-23T15:54:00.002-04:00

I've never seen a place so well defined by its bumperstickers as St. John. I grew up in Wyoming, and even though we could sport the random bucking bronc or "Wrangler butts drive me nuts", they weren't strictly for a certain town and certainly were not necessarily indicative of the environment. Seattle and Cape Town, South African hardly had anything meaningful, and not even NYC. But welcome to St. John! Maybe because it is such a tourist destination, and a lot of locals take such ownership over its beauty, ironies, and oddities. Here is a tell-tale bumpersticker sampling that gives you a good idea about this place:

-We're all here, 'cuz we're not all there
-St. John: world's largest open air asylum
-The odds are good, but the goods are odd (my favorite)

I know I'm forgetting some, but you get the idea. All appropriate and very much defining of my daily life. I'm surrounded by a bunch of freaks.

We tried

2008-04-23T15:36:00.005-04:00

Had a date with Jason last night...a little picnic out on Peace Hill on the North Shore. Usually it is a great view for the sunset, but the vegetation was overgrown. There were also a lot of mosquitoes, and A LOT of ants. They invaded our picnic in a big way. It was time to make a quick move out when I saw 2 piles-one on each side of us-of thousands of ants in about a 4 inch diameter area. Yick. But the food was also good once we got back to our usual dining area at home...the bed. Terrible but true, our apartment size does not allow for chairs. Some photos from our short excursion...

Mosquito Whisperer

2008-04-19T15:36:00.003-04:00

First off, is Jason naked? I'll leave you guessing on that one. Just know, we live in a very warm climate where minimal to no clothing is the most desirable state of being.

Also in this warm climate we have mosquitoes. Lots of mosquitoes. We just get used to having around 3 or more lively little houseguests at any given time. This situation is generally fine and not too bothersome. One gets immune over time to the bites. But they are a nuisance, and when you get the occasional one that makes the buzzing noise...eh! Lucky for me, I have a boyfriend who really has a talent for killing these critters.

One normally wouldn't think of such a thing as a "talent", but trust me, it is. I often awake in the night to the swoosh noise of the racket sailing through the air. He can do it in the dark! Such a gratifying sound the crackle when one is hit (plus in the dark there is a great spark). And when I am being bothered in bed by one buzzing in my ear, it doesn't matter the ungodly hour, I just poke my man in the side and the racket is waving quickly over my head in a matter of seconds. It is really amazing that he has yet to hit me, which I must admit I am pretty grateful for. I shocked myself with one of those rackets once (everyone has to do it once) and it gives quite the jolt.

The science of the mosquito way is quite complicated...something I never realized until I lived on St. John. You have the 'disappearing mosquito' that just magically vanishes, the 'fat and happy mosquito' that is full of blood and lounging somewhere waiting to make a blood baby, and the 'camouflage mosquito' that flies around dark fabrics and other shady areas. Jason rules them all. Seriously! It is one of those things that he can do that I just can't. Sure, the occasional one dies in my clapping hands, but I have nothing on him. HE IS MY HERO!

You would understand if you lived here, which you likely don't, so pooh! By the way, itching a mosquito bite on my left leg as I write.

My island weekend

2008-04-14T18:08:00.005-04:00

A commendation to those friends who have made it to this little island paradise in the 3+ years I've been here, and a rattle to the cages of those who have not. Here is a little insight into my simple existence. Not a thrilling post, as my life is certainly far from that, just a little idea of how I live down here.

This weekend I was fortunate enough to have 2 days off in a row. It also happened that they were actual weekend days. So here is what I did:

Saturday...after the mission of doing laundry, I drove over to visit my friend Nancy in Coral Bay where she bartends at Aqua Bistro.

I got to hang out with my friend Marvin and his brother Bre. They were testing my brain with riddles and puzzles after I was a few drinks in, which made me feel a bit stupid.

And then...a road beer for the ride back to Cruz Bay. Here is a view overlooking Coral Bay from the drive home. It has been so brown and dead. Ready for this dry season to get over. Still has a little charm.

A little nap followed by a dinner out with the ladies made for a super duper Saturday. And then Sunday...

We decided to celebrate our friend Jess's 30th a few weeks late since we couldn't make it to the original party. Jason and I had brunch with her and her girls Vanessa and Briana, then off to Gibney Beach for some sun and cocktails.